http://master.livejournal.com/ (![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png)
master.livejournal.com) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
projectroxas2009-01-30 09:09 pm
master.livejournal.com) wrote in projectroxas2009-01-30 09:09 pm
(no subject)
Chronicle III ; Section IV
File XXV
OPENING FILE...
FILE SUCCESSFULLY OPENED
CONTINUE? Y/N
April 15th
Roxas' Birthday
The month of April had always been a good time for Roxas. It meant that he could sit outside without catching a cold, even if he still had to wear semi-heavy clothing, but those were small details that he could overlook. Though that was mainly Sora's fault, seeing as how he always kept a close eye on Roxas, always at his side when he went out to enjoy the sun. Despite most of the days being quite nice, they did have rain several times throughout the month. But today was a special day, and Roxas already knew the answer to Ansem's question.
“It'll be sunny all day,” he answered, looking out his window with a smile on his face. “I know it will be.”
And he was right, it was sunny and warm, despite the weather report saying otherwise. Sora was quite pleased with how it all worked out, knowing that his younger brother wanted to be outside for his birthday, rather than sitting inside staring at the rain pounding on the windows.
Sora was probably more excited about Roxas' birthday than Roxas himself was. He had been planning on giving him something special since he was turning thirteen. It was a big thing to finally be a teenager, or so Sora thought. Maybe he had other motives behind it, but he didn't even realize this; he simply wanted to see his brother brighten up and be excited over something for the first time in weeks, instead of looking disappointed when he wasn't allowed to get out of bed.
Though that wasn't much of a problem anymore. Sora took it upon himself to get his brother a wheelchair, declaring that he'd be the one to help him get around if need be. Thankfully Roxas agreed with this plan, extremely pleased that Sora was taking his side for once. Part of him knew that was because his birthday was just around the corner, but he hoped that this new found kinship towards freedom stuck around for longer than a few days. It wasn't exactly frustrating to have his older brother tell him to stay in bed and not move an inch until his fever went down, but it was discouraging from time to time. Roxas tried to be positive despite this. He had to be, after all, or else--
“Happy birthday!” Sora declared as he popped in front of Roxas' wheelchair, hands behind his back to hide the gift in his palms. The blond jumped slightly at being interrupted from his book (it was his father's gift, among several others), blinking several times at the suddenness.
“You scared me.” A hand rose to place it upon his chest, looking up at his brother with an amused expression on his face. “You're late, you know.”
“I am not.”
“You are so.”
“How is that possible when I worship the ground you--” He paused, looking Roxas up and down. A smirk rose upon his face, knowing this was the time to not act serious. “--roll upon.”
Roxas rolled his eyes. “Ha ha, very funny.”
“I knew you'd get a kick out of that one.”
“And I knew father would get up at 7am to visit me in my room.”
Ugh. Sora cringed at that, forgetting once again that Ansem usually beat him to presenting Roxas with his birthday gifts. It really wasn't a surprise, in all honesty, but Sora still felt a little stupid (jealous) that he didn't get there first. Perhaps now was the time to use the "last but not least" rule in order to keep himself from scowling some more.
“He probably didn't even sleep.”
“Maybe,” Roxas hummed, closing his book as Sora moved to stand in front of him, his position changing when the brunette got on his knees and held up the gift.
It wasn't big, nor was it tiny, it was simple and just the right size, though this only piqued Roxas' interest even more as he took the gift into his hands. The boy lightly caressed the white box and the blue ribbon that held it together. The ribbons were curled, falling across the edges, held up by the blue and white bow pressed firmly in the middle of the beautiful mess. Roxas almost felt bad for wanting to open it. Sora really did put too much time in the simplest things.
“Can I keep the box?” Roxas asked in a curious tone, looking down at Sora as his brother laughed at him.
“If you'd like,” he said, though found his heart racing at the thought of Roxas liking something he took time to create. It was pounding so hard inside his chest, the anticipation rising within each second as small fingers untied everything from its tight hold, brushing digits against the white box that enclosed the prize inside.
Hesitating for a brief moment, Roxas took a breath and then opened the lid, peering in to see something shiny and silver.
“Oh!” The box was promptly put down on top of the boy's lap, reaching in to gently take out the thin necklace, observing the small charm at the end of it. The silver swallow was, like the box that contained it, neither small nor large, though it did fit perfectly in Roxas' hand. His smile was wide and Sora's heart was thump thumping at the sight, taking it in as much as humanly possible, though he hesitated on lifting his hands to take the gift from Roxas' own.
“Can I?” He shyly said, swallowing hard in some kind of preparation of being denied. But Roxas nodded and lifted the small bit of hair that fell lightly on the nape of his neck (he was in dire need of a haircut, but those things didn't even matter anymore), attempting to get a look at Sora as he turned to walk behind his brother again, gently undoing the clasp to swing it around swiftly, hooking it together once again to form a perfect circle. Sora's hands lingered on Roxas' neck briefly, running deft fingers down the smooth skin as he seemed to daze into something unknown to anyone but himself. It took a moment for him to realize what he was doing and he pulled back quickly, hoping that Roxas didn't notice his lingering touch.
Thankfully he didn't, and Sora sighed out a breath of relief when his brother fingered the charm lightly, Roxas' smile softening as he glanced down at it. “It's very beautiful,” he murmured quietly, Sora already knowing that this was his way of showing his appreciation. This unfortunately made it hard for Sora to keep his hands off of him, but he stayed put and kept himself in check, returning the smile instead of initiating any more contact. That could be very dangerous at this point.
“I'm glad you like it.” Before he gave up on holding back, Sora pushed his hands into his pockets, finally pleased with himself for accomplishing all of the things he had been wanting to do that day:
1. Give Roxas his gift.
2. Make Roxas happy with said gift.
3. Make Roxas smile
4. Not make too much contact, else he could finally destroy the perfect balance he strived so hard to keep.
As the trees rustled and the wind blew cool, spring air between them, Sora couldn't help but lift a hand to put it on top of Roxas' head, a thumb rubbing the soft, limp hair idly as they both sat in complete silence.
Maybe it was alright to ignore that last goal. At least for today, anyway.
April 20th
Alone Case #5
Attack # ???
“Are you sure you'll be fine, Sora?”
The young man huffed at his father and put his hands on his hips, looking a little disgruntled at Ansem even thinking about asking such a thing. Why, he could do all of this by himself if he wanted to!
Sure, he didn't know how to cook and he didn't really know how to clean, but that's why they had people to do it for them, right? Of course, Ansem himself took a liking to cooking, though most of the time he was too busy to invest in such a hobby. Sora was perfectly fine with that, seeing as how he remembered his father making “spaghetti” for a eight year old Sora and two year old Roxas, their mother previously agreeing to let him do it for the night. Needless to say that Sora said “Yuck!” and pushed the bowl away, while Roxas grabbed it with a fist and shoved it happily into his mouth.
Maybe cooking didn't run in the family, save for their late mother, of course. Sora always wondered if Roxas had ever tried cooking, but with the way he was in his room for most of his life, well. He guessed he never had the chance to. With that thought still lingering in his mind, Sora frown slightly as his father picked up his bags and bid him farewell for the weekend.
And that's when Sora got his brilliant, fabulous idea.
Later on in the night he stopped the cook from doing his work, declaring that he would take over for him for the rest of the night. Sora promptly ignored the man's weary expression, shooing him out and away back towards the room he resided in. The good thing about having a large house (mansion) was having cooks and maids at your beck and call. If Sora wanted food at 3 in the morning? Someone would be up to make it for him. It was just as easy as that. Lucky for them that Ansem paid them very well, else they probably would have quit due to the eldest brother requesting ridiculous things in the wee hours of the morning. Sure, it was mainly because he was bored, but he still did it every now and then for kicks. Lucky for him that he didn't get kicked for being obnoxious.
Still, Sora hoped this would work out just like he had planned.
(The odd thing about this was that Sora didn't have any ulterior motives in this gesture for his brother. How strange, especially with what happened three weeks later.)
“You did?” Roxas said in amazement, gazing upon his brother with a surprised and almost thrilled look.
Since he seemed pleased at Sora's idea, and he looked well enough to sit in a chair downstairs to help him, it was then that the brunette smiled and bent down, raising his hand with his palm facing up, offering said limb to his brother for support.
“Of course.” Roxas took his hand; Sora's heart jumped into his throat. “But we first have to get you there in one piece.”
The soft, caring smile on Roxas' face was evident, as well as the way he placed his own hand into Sora's, gripping it tightly as he stood up from the chair with wheels. He briefly wobbled and shook every so slightly at the weight of his body, even if he was terribly thin by then, but Sora was quick to catch him by the waist.
“Maybe I should carry you.”
“It's alright, I'm fine.”
“We've got to go down several flights of stairs.”
“I can try. I can.”
Sora didn't object to that, not with the way his younger brother sounded so determined despite the beading sweat on his brow, face focused straight ahead, not even bothering to look at his own two feet. It was admirable, in a way. It was also endearing, though Sora didn't want to take any risks, but he respected his brother enough to take his other hand to help him walk.
“At least let me do this,” he whispered, an almost forlorn look in his eyes.
Roxas couldn't deny him this self(ish)less act.
The way down, however, was quite difficult. The elder of the two certainly did hold on to the younger as best as he could, taking careful, easy steps, hoping that he could be the support Roxas needed the most. After a few almost-tumbles and a leg giving out underneath him (???), it was decided then that Roxas would be carried. Surprisingly enough, Sora didn't suggest this right away. Perhaps he was trying his best to keep himself away from any excess contact, but he felt so very, very needed as Roxas laid his head against the other's chest, eyes closing in exhaustion.
(START of new information acquired.)
“Sora?” A faint, weak whisper breathed from out of Roxas' lips, eyes slitting open slightly to stare down at his own lap, a sort of drowsy, distant look on his face. “I don't—I don't feel so good.”
It took less than a second for Sora to stop moving, his foot hovering over the next step as he did. He balanced himself as he let the foot fall to the bump behind his heel, pressing the sole of his shoe down on top of the soft carpet.
“We're almost there,” he said tenderly, holding onto Roxas a bit tighter, though the gesture was done with such compassion that it almost seemed as if he were doing nothing at all. “I don't think we could make it back upstairs to your room.”
“Here. Here, now.” Smaller hands gripped a white shirt, careful in his movements while slipping in and out of the hazy look he had on his face. There were several times that Roxas dazed off into nothing, almost as if he were not aware of the things around him. Ansem could never figure out why this was (Perhaps a temporary loss of consciousness? The several other symptoms never did help in pinpointing what exactly caused this.) and it tumbled in his mind several days of the week, though it wasn't his main focus on attempting to find what exactly was wrong with his son. The jumble of potential causes for this twisted, undefinable illness kept him up at night, trying to piece together all the little parts of the puzzle that made Roxas' disease tick.
Having to live through it, however, was more painful than trying to find a cure.
“Alright,” Sora said quietly, knees bending to slowly and carefully bring them both down together, one edge of the stairs claimed as their makeshift seat for the time being.
With Roxas half-laying in his lap, panting as if he had run a race just a moment ago, Sora couldn't help but be reminded with how... fragile he was. It was as if he were a porcelain doll, something that couldn't be touched by the hands of those who weren't gentle enough to handle such a precious item. That's how Sora felt, anyway. Nobody but him should have been able to touch Roxas, to feel him in such an intimate way. No. No, there could never be anyone else worthy of what Sora was able to do at that moment in time, of what Sora could and will do, so long as Roxas allowed it.
He was his brother's keeper. It was only natural that he would be the one to enclose him in his arms, to rock him back and forth in a comforting way, to have his nose pressed into that golden, flaying hair of his, to just... inhale him while he could.
Unlike the people that resided in a hospital bed, Roxas had never smelled of death. There was a certain light about him as he continued to decline, even if said light was slowly but surely disappearing. Still, he always had the lingering scent of life, as if part of him would live on forever. Mentally. Emotionally. Spiritually. Physically.
If it were up to Sora (Years later it would be.), he wouldn't have Roxas die at all. Even if he had not the nameless illness, the elder brother would have thought he could live forever.
The blond angel in his arms whimpered as he curled tighter in Sora's hold, face pressed against a firm chest as he gripped the material tighter. “It hurts,” is what Sora anticipated him to say, but Roxas kept his bottom lip between his teeth as he worked through the pain, fought against whatever it was that invaded his body that ate him from the inside out.
“It's okay,” Sora murmured into the crown of Roxas' head, holding him firmly as he swayed oh-so gently from side to side, trying to offer him solace even if he knew that it would only work so well. If he could take the disease upon himself he would in a heartbeat, but the cruel, hard truth was that he couldn't. There were only so many things he could do, and taking away the physical pain was next to impossible. He hoped that the warmth and his words could at least ease off some of it. “I'm here.”
Why did life have to be so heartless?
Being so preoccupied in focusing in on their internal physical being rather than what was going on around them, Sora didn't notice his brother sobbing until he looked down, eyes now focusing on the crimson that blotted across his shirt and Roxas' lap, the dribbling of blood from the other's nose leaving a stained, ugly mess on the white that covered their bodies.
“Oh god,” was Sora's sudden response, standing up immediately while trying to keep his composure so he didn't drop Roxas in the process.
Sometimes he'd bleed, sometimes he'd get sick to his stomach, sometimes he'd run a fever, and sometimes he'd blackout completely. The bleeding was the rarest and scariest of the four symptoms that caused some sort of alarm (Amongst the others that still make absolutely no sense.), specifically the times when he bled from the eyes. Still, blood was never a good sign, which was why Sora ran and jumped (lightly) down the stairs, shouting for the doctors on the first floor to aid him. Even if it took less than thirty seconds for them to appear, Sora couldn't help but panic, though he gladly handed him over to more “capable” hands for the time being.
Even if he thought that nobody was worthy of touching his precious, irreplaceable brother, he couldn't help but allow it to happen every once in a while.
(END of new information.)
May 4th
Alone Case #6
(Prelude To ???)
Two weeks had passed between Roxas' major (and quite sudden) health hazard, the boy finally feeling much better and more aware than usual. Even if he were ordered to stay down for those two weeks, he couldn't help but sneak out of bed every now and then to sit by the window, peering out towards the trees and the earth around him. The world should have been his for the taking, and yet he wasn't even allowed to so much as think about sitting elsewhere, much less go outside his room.
Roxas never complained, though. He knew his father and Sora had their reasons, perfectly aware of their fright every time something happened. But the times in between always seemed so perfect, so why wasn't he out living life for those free, painless weeks when he wanted to so very, very badly.
Perhaps they were just a tad bit overprotective. Roxas guessed that he couldn't blame them, but at least week three was coming up, which meant that they would soon cave in and let him go explore for a while. Despite popular belief, Roxas knew when to step outside the mansion and when to stay inside. He wasn't stupid. He was the one carrying the disease, after all. Sometimes he'd get no warning for the attacks, and other times something told him that it was coming, though it usually struck at the oddest and most inconvenient times. Such is life.
(Ansem had told his sons that afternoon that he needed to go overseas for a week. Was this the cause of this madness? Did something in the mansion shift and change while his sons were alone for so long? Nobody knows.)
They were alone. For that entire week, they had time to themselves. Roxas thought that Sora would perhaps allow him to do as he pleased, since he was quite well for the time being. In fact, he could even stand and walk around, though he had to take very small steps to get from Point A to Point B. They also had to be very short distances, but Roxas didn't mind. Anything was better than lying in a bed, rotting away in the inside while looking fine on the out, or at least better than the decaying walls of his inner body. Every day he felt like his organs were deteriorating, soaked and then set out somewhere moist and dark for days, collecting mold and dust and gnats and other gross things that made him squirm when asleep.
That's all he dreamed about, too. His nightmares were real, as real as the skin that he touched when awake, those blue eyes staring down at what he thought was decomposed flesh sliding off of muscle and bone. Perhaps that also had to do with his occasional hallucinations, the ones that made him scream as he scratched himself raw all over, later claiming that he felt crawling all over his body, as if there were insects trapped inside somewhere. It had only happened once, the bugs inside of his body, but to this day he could have sworn that he still felt them. They were making a nest somewhere, taking pleasure in feeding off of him and leeching until he died. No, even then they would continue, wouldn't they?
Death tasted sweeter than life ever could.
For now, though, the window took his mind off of all of that. His dreams outside of unconsciousness consisted of flying, flying as high as the birds in the sky, gliding off anywhere and everywhere, so long as it took him far away.
But he wasn't a bird. He was the host to the madness within his being, those sick, vile insects stringing webs across his ribcage, slowly spinning threads along the cave of his belly, touching everything and anything it could touch. Roxas felt disgusting. He was repulsive and foul within the corrosion of bones that slowly and painfully dug down deeper, hallowing the once strong connections throughout his physic.
At times he swore that he heard the snapping of tendon. Perhaps more illusions, but Roxas didn't care at that point. It all sounded and felt the same to him.
Despite all of this he remained positive. Maybe the melody of his father's voice strove him to look to the bright side, or maybe it was because of the way his brother was so kind and caring, always there for him when he needed it. But it wasn't any of those things. Roxas felt guilty that he couldn't give anything back to them, so he tried to put a smile on his face instead, knowing that it was the best gift he could ever give to them.
Sometimes he couldn't help it, though he tried his hardest to suppress any inkling of pain from crossing his features. It was hard, and he never succeeded, but at least he could say that he tried.
As usual he fell into a glum mood (It seems Roxas was prone to bouts of apathy. Depression, perhaps? Or something else entirely irrelevant.), though this was soon remedied by Sora, who came into Roxas' room as soon as the boy slipped away from the seat at the window right back into his bed.
“Hey, sleepyhead,” the other's voice said quietly, peering in the room to see if the boy was awake or not. When he confirmed of Roxas' awareness he invited himself in, not bothering in closing the door behind him.
“Hey,” Roxas replied, feeling exhausted already, but he forced himself to remain awake long enough to speak with his brother. Though he was curious on what he was doing in his room at twelve in the afternoon, knowing that Sora usually took care of the other scientists in the labs around that time. Or maybe that was just a farce, who knew, though something told Roxas that Sora was being honest when he told him of what he did on a day-to-day basis, seeing as how Roxas didn't go downstairs very often.
“How are you feeling?” The elder took no time in walking on over to Roxas' bed, carefully seating himself on the edge of it. Said younger brother slid his hand across the sheets, reaching out for his sibling's hand as he smiled up at him.
“A lot better.” As he felt a larger, stronger hand squeeze his own, Roxas curled it around Sora's palm, enjoying the contact it gave them.
“Good,” Sora breathed out in relief, the squaring of his shoulders relaxing fully as the teetering bit of stress waned away. Still, Roxas couldn't help but look at him quietly after that, thinking on the thing he was wondering about moments ago. What was it, anyway?
“Oh,” Roxas said, eyes widening for a brief second before lazily resting back. “What are you doing up here, anyway? I thought you had stuff to do in the afternoon.”
“Well, I didn't want to be in there if you were in here. Is that alright?”
“It's more than alright, Sora.”
“I thought so.” Amusement hit the tip of Sora's tongue as he smiled, a little goofy-like. “Would you like some lunch? I could bring it up here for you if you'd like.”
Roxas' face deadpanned. “That isn't a question, is it.”
“Nope. I'm having someone bring up food right now.”
“You're hopeless.”
“No, I'm your big brother.”
Roxas lifted a hand to lightly smack Sora's shoulder, looking slightly amused in the process. As if on cue, someone came in with the food, which was presented to them on a tray. The blond peered over at it as Sora carefully sat it down on the bed, standing up to help Roxas sit comfortably in his bed. A pillow shifting here, a few pushes of the comforter there; it always seemed as if Sora nitpicked at the smallest, more irrelevant things, but Roxas knew he had good intentions. It was one reason why he never scowled at his brother for acting as if he were something that could break any moment. The nature of the actions were too integrated into Sora's being that it would be cruel to shove him away for, well... just being him.
“I hope soup is fine.”
“It's perfect.”
“Are you sure you're not just saying that so Jeff doesn't have to make you something else?”
“No.” A pause. “Well, maybe, but I really don't mind.”
“If you're sure.”
“I am.”
The edges of Sora's lips twitched up briefly as he arranged the food on the tray, carefully handing Roxas the bowl with a brief mention of it being hot, that he should let it rest upon a pillow instead of his lap. Roxas complied and did as he was told, propping up further to balance himself before beginning to eat.
Most of the time he didn't bother eating anything at all (it would only please the bugs, after all), but Sora was so kind to do this, which is why he tried to eat as much as he could.
“Is it good?” The brunette asked after a while, a hopeful look on his face.
“It is,” Roxas smiled, lifting the spoon to move it toward his brother's mouth. “Try it.”
“No way, it's for you, not me.”
“Please?”
Playing dirty was something Roxas was good at and Sora knew this very well. How could he deny such a look, those puppy eyes and a cute pout driving him mad as he opened his mouth, greeting and swallowing the contents that would strive to keep Roxas healthy, even if it would fail.
“It is pretty good.”
“Isn't it? You'll have to thank Joe for me later.”
Smiling widely at his brother was such an easy task, much easier than trying to take away his pain. A hand lifted then to stroke down Roxas' cheek, rounding off the edge of his chin before pulling away slowly.
“I will.”
(The next part is neither truth nor is it fiction. Some say it happened, others say it's just a figment of Sora's imagination.)
There were very rare times when Roxas called Sora something other than his name, and those times usually consisted of the blond wanting to talk in a serious manner. The connection between the two could be overlook at times, today being no exception, especially with the windows wide open and the sun spilling across the room, the sight soothing and calm, almost as if the entire world could see what the siblings were gazing upon.
“Brother?”
Sora seemed to twitch lightly as Roxas' smooth, fair voice, though he took his time in looking on over, the “yes?” that slipped between his lips was almost as quiet as Roxas' own.
The younger of the two shifted slightly, holding tightly onto Sora’s hand as he did so, though he only moved enough to lean forward and rest his head on the other’s shoulder. Roxas didn't know was Sora was thinking at the moment, but with the way they both stood still after the blond nuzzled into the crook of the other's neck, Roxas knew that the unknown comfort Sora gave him was enough. But he had to speak his mind, else he'd forget to say it later on.
“You're always here, aren't you?” Feeling some form of guilt in these words, Roxas squeezed his eyes shut tightly, allowing them to slide open as he looked at nothing in particular. “You’re not lonely? Being here with me, I mean.”
A hand cupped the back of Roxas' head slowly, almost hesitantly, though he didn't seem to notice until Sora made contact with his skull. Oh, what he would have done to stay there like that, the peaceful atmosphere, the warmth, and the one who cared for him so much was all he needed. Yes, he would have liked the pain he felt to go away, but it wouldn't, so he'd take what he could get while he had the chance to.
“Never,” his brother answered, breathing him in, the sincerity in his words as clear as the sky had been.
Roxas sighed in relief at his words, finally content knowing that he wasn't such a burden, knowing that his brother would never lie to him. Sometimes there were moments where they both had to tell little white lies, but the bigger, more important things were never turned into false truths. Not when it had to do with their emotions and their relationship, the bond they had being precious to Roxas. Knowing that Sora found it equally as precious made him relax as he was eased back down onto the bed, giving a very faint look of appreciation up at the young man before him.
The stillness was interrupted when Roxas lifted his arm, fingers lightly brushing against the side of Sora's cheek. His eyes held a look of fondness in them, a silent way of telling him how much he appreciated what Sora did for him.
With his eyelids heavy and his body tired, Roxas' hand slid down back onto the bed, turning his head ever-so-slightly to the side, finally giving in to the sleep he so desperately needed.
(END of data. More will be added on if the archives contain it.)
May 7th
Alone Case #9
The Event
Manic Stage One
Day four of their alone time. It was another day where Roxas felt perfectly fine and seemed healthy enough, his condition clearly saying loud and clear that he was fine to (try to) walk around. He still couldn't get down the stairs, but he could certainly walk down the hallways if he so wished. It just so happened that the floor his bedroom resided in contained a very long, spacious walkway, which is where Roxas currently dwelled, hands pressed against the wall to support himself as he took tiny, careful steps towards an unknown destination.
The trip was rather boring after a while despite the freedom, yet it was still nice to get outside of his room. A lot of new paintings were nailed to the wall, so Roxas took his time in observing them at his angle, knowing quite well that looking at the ones on the opposite wall probably would have been a better idea.
Still, that was the extent of his day. Roxas was rather pleased with himself as he made his way back towards his room (he walked so much, without the help of Sora), quite content in sitting down on the chair by the window again, head rested against the sill as he breathed in the spring air.
Even if the day was nice and Roxas felt accomplished, he couldn't help but open his eyes and stare off into the distance, mulling over some thoughts that resided in the back of his mind. It was true that Roxas felt like he didn't remember most events that had happened weeks before, but it was getting bad to the point of him not recalling what happened a few days ago. Perhaps he was just tired or perhaps it was another reason, Roxas wasn't sure. It was a cause of concern, that much was true, but he brushed it off in order to spend some quality time with Sora without causing any sort of alarm. Good thing his body decided to give him a rest, the only time he gave into the burning of his body was late at night, when nobody was around him.
Within a sigh Roxas felt himself drifting off into slumber, eyes closing slowly after he curled his arms up on the sill, the side of his face pressed against the firmness.
It seemed as if he had only slept for a few minutes before a hand shook his shoulder lightly, the boy in the chair waking up from his slumber. Roxas was surprised at the darkness outside, suddenly realizing that he had slept the afternoon away. Had Sora been down at the labs all day? He couldn't recall him being around at all, but maybe Roxas had forgotten if they did something or not.
That wasn't his main concern as he lifted his head up, eyes shifting to stare up at Sora. The side of his lips crept upward, his face looking sleepy and a bit dazed from the wake-up call.
“Well good morning, lazy,” Sora chided jokingly, shifting to lean against the wall next to Roxas' open window. “Did you sleep the whole day away?”
“No!” Roxas huffed, cheeks puffed out in what Sora called “adorable.” “I walked around, thank you very much.”
The taller one's eyes widened slightly, but it seemed as if he decided not to say what was on his mind, instead nodding with a grin on his face. “I'm impressed. You didn't use the wheelchair or anything else?”
“No.” Roxas paused briefly, looking down at his lap. “... well, I did have some support, but it wasn't much.”
“I see.” With his eyes cast down upon the brother he so adored, Sora couldn't help but brush away the long strands of hair across Roxas' face, not bothering to remove deft fingers as he continued stroking affectionately. He paused when he noticed the droplets on Roxas' forehead, eyebrows scrunching as he paused within another stroke.
“You're cold.”
“I'm fine.”
“No, you're not.”
Sora reached out and took Roxas by his waist, helping him stand up before taking his hand to start walking towards the bathroom.
“What are you—“
“You need a warm bath.”
“I told you that I'm fine.”
“No!”
They stopped abruptly, Roxas blinking a few times at Sora's sudden outburst. It was probably the first time Roxas had heard Sora raise his voice at him, along with the annoyed tone that he carried. If it was supposed to deter him from denying the bath comment, then it definitely worked, though it also brought back that guilt he was feeling before.
“Sora...”
“You just—please do this for me, alright?”
Nothing more was said as they wandered off towards their destination.
Water dripped from Roxas' hair as he stood in his room, panting heavily as he glared at his older brother. The carpet underneath his feet soaked up the liquid from undried locks, his usual blond tainted and drenched, looking darker and dirtier than usual thanks to his bath that was interrupted by his sudden realization.
“STOP IT,” he screamed, hands pressed firmly against the wall he currently leaned upon, balancing himself after storming off from the bathroom at such a rate that should have left him collapsing on the ground. “Just STOP IT, STOP IT, STOP-!”
(More of The Event has been collected, even though it is broken into several parts that doesn't seem to make any sense.)
Sora slightly bent his back while craning his neck enough to brush his nose against Roxas’, finally breathing in the boy he loved so much.
“I know what you did!” Roxas continued to shout, swaying slightly to the side as he kept looking up at his brother with a disgusted look on his face. “I know what you DO-!”
He couldn't help himself--
“Roxas, what are you—”
Without a warning or another word, Sora found himself brushing his lips against Roxas'—
“NO! Don't talk to me, don't even look at me!”
Confusion was written all over Sora's face as he stood there awkwardly, unsure if he should move or stay. Part of him wanted to move forward, to get him to calm down from whatever kind of madness that took him over, to help instead of being lost and confused. He wanted to guess that it was once again a delusion, something that twisted and turned inside of Roxas, skipping a ridge as the cog slipped and tumbled into the hallow pit of his stomach. The clock that ticked inside of his younger brother's chest must have finally rusted and broke, that internal tick-tocking that would soon cease to beat.
But it wasn't. It was something else that he would never be able to understand.
“Roxas,” Sora started, almost looking as if he were on the verge of tears. “Roxas, please—”
—putting some light force into the kiss that he had craved so very, very much.
“Shut up shut up shut up shut up SHUT UP—!”
A picture of the siblings on Roxas' nightstand was hauled up after his cry, a weak hand that could usually do nothing chucked it as hard as it could onto the wall behind Sora, the glass shattering into brilliant sparks of crystal and shredded paper.
“You're SICK.” A few steps were made, then, the boy's body staying as composed as it was capable of. “You're TWISTED!”
All he remembered past that was the feeling of wanting to melt right then and there, to mold himself within Roxas in order to keep him there with him.
Roxas' hands clutched his head as he fought an internal struggle before he wobbled, feet planted firmly on the ground to keep himself from falling over.
He wanted him to stay.
A part of him didn't even care if he did.
He refused to let him go.
He wanted to be let go. He didn't care anymore.
He swore that he wouldn’t let death itself stand in his way.
No, no Roxas wanted death. He longed for death. He sobbed into his pillow each night as he clenched his teeth to stop himself from screaming, praying for the day that he'd stop breathing, where he could become death itself.
Sora fed himself the love (lust) he craved—
The blond's legs buckled and finally gave out from underneath him, pain finally shooting up his legs, continuing its travel through his body as it ripped him from the inside out. Roxas couldn't hold it back as he let himself go, finally letting himself scream and cry and wail and shout that it hurt, it hurt so badly. His fingernails dug into his scalp, head bowed down between his legs as blood tainted the bath water that still kept its place on the ground.
—and he wanted more and more and more and yes, yes, this was it—
The buzzing noises that he had faintly heard every day grew louder and louder, panic rising up as his eyes widened, head shooting up from its place between his legs, a wild, frightened look on his face.
“GET THEM OFF-!” The nails that gripped his head soon moved to his legs, his stomach, his chest. “Get them OFF, I don't want them IN ME!”
But his hands, they’ve moved now—
Sora jumped into action, hands darting out to grab at Roxas' as he held him back from tearing apart anymore of his skin.
—down Roxas’ neck and around his throat—
Roxas shrieked, thrashing about in Sora's hold, that dazed, foggy look beginning to take over.
—choking and strangling the one person he would die for—
“Roxas?” Sora said quietly. His brother's screams suddenly stopped.
No, no, no, this was wrong, what was he doing?
“Roxas?” He said again, a look of panic on his face as his brother stopped, lying back against the wall limply.
Stop it, he screamed to himself, but no words came out.
His breath quickened, eyes darting up and down the boy's body as Roxas lie as still as he did while sleeping, though his chest gently rose up and down. But his eyes faced downward, head lolled slightly to let his chin rest upon his chest.
Stop, stop, stop, stop STOP.
It was then that Sora could have sworn that he heard the thin, unmoving line of beeping on a monitor in a hospital, the sound blocking out the medical team that rushed into the room, everything almost seeming as if it were done in slow-motion. All he could see was the blank look on his brother's face, the blood that continued to slide down pale skin, and his hands lying limp at his sides.
There was nothing else that could be said.
May 8th
---
Roxas fell into a coma at approximately 8:35pm.
August 1st
Death
August 4th
Death Case #1
Final Folder Complete
Unfortunately there are no record of any of the events that took place at the funeral itself.
This case has been CLOSED.
September 10th
Death Case #2
Ansem is found dead at approximately 1:50am.
September 12th
Missing Case #1
Sora goes missing.
December 14th
Missing Case #2
Whereabouts of Sora is still unknown.
January 1st
Lost & Found Case #1
Sora has returned. Labs are up and running again.
An unknown project has begun.
A new case has been created.
This case has been CLOSED.
CLOSING FILE...
FILE SUCCESSFULLY CLOSED
CONTINUE TO A NEW FILE? Y/N