projectroxas | (no subject)

Yeah, I know, but... [ pouts and kicks an invisible rock. ] Man, nobody lets me get on in the action anymore. Being small sucks.

[ gives her hand a squeeze. ]

Help with machine is important too. Keep me and Herr Aaron safe!

But even Haru gets to go kick butt sometimes...

[ looks confused, not understanding what she's so upset about. after a while, he decides to recite what a past-teammate had once told him as a gentle reminder: ]

Is important to do what we is good at. Work together as team, not look for self-victory because self-victory is the easy way to die.

I don't want self-victory, I just wanna help you out!

Like... you know, right next to you. Instead of crammed in a corner...

[ stops & lets go of her hand. cups her face in his hands to emphasize the importance of his next words. ]

You must listen, Nathan-ee-ah. It is not what Nathan-ee-ah want, but Nathan-ee-ah cannot fight. It is not what you is good at, and it is bad for mission if I or Herr Aaron must protect Nathan-ee-ah too. SAVE say Nathan-ee-ah work with machine and keep me and Herr Aaron safe, so that is what Nathan-ee-ah must do.

[ lets that sink in, then adds quietly in german: ] < You are already helping a lot with your assigned task. SAVE is about saving other people, not about our own desires, so no more complaints. This is work. >

[ stares up at him while he speaks, unmoving. it's only when he's finished (and after some well-needed silence) that she huffs then twists her head away, pushing caleb's face back with one of her hands. ]

Fine. [ crosses arms over chest, beginning their walk again. ] But don't cry to me when you need someone to bite ankles and I'm not there for you.

[ is silent for a moment after that, thinking. looks down at her hands, curling them into fists as she speaks slowly. ]

It's just... after I got to know you guys, I started to sometimes wonder what it would've been like if I were a boy, you know? Maybe I would've been strong like you, and I could do more than I'm capable of now. [ tiny shrug. ] Sure, I'm good at computers and stuff, but I'm not the only one in this world that is. I could easily be replaced, unlike you or Haru... or even Aaron. You guys are one of a kind. You're... so special.

[ tugs on her ponytail to loosen it, playing with the long strand as she typically does at these moments. lets out a little laugh after another moment of thought, waving a hand at him. ]

Anyway, don't take my complaining so seriously, 'kay? I'm a big girl, I'll get over it by myself.

[ trails after her, keeping a careful distance between them. ]

Ja, I know. But. . . [ quietly again: ] I think Nathan-ee-ah would not be in SAVE if Nathan-ee-ah is not special. Is special to team and to me.

[ slowly smiles at that, trotting back a few paces so she can slip her hand into one of his own. squeezes. ]

As long as I'm special to you, then I don't need to be special to anyone else.

[ returns the squeeze. ]

But is not true. Nathan-ee-ah is special to many people. Family, new baby, team, SAVE, Hilda and me. Family and me most! But that is many people.

Well... you are my family too, you know. Sort of. [ ducks head down, flushing a little. ] But thanks.

[ immediately: ] Is truth!

[ then seems to pause over the first part & backtrack. thinks about it a little... ] I am family? Not liebe or team?

Um... no, you still are, I just mean-- [ pauses. fidgets with her hair. when she can't explain it very well: ] Naw, nevermind. You'll get it someday.

[ blinks, but nods in acceptance. ]

Okay. I believe Nathan-ee-ah.

[ smiles up at him, leaning over to kiss his shoulder. after a few more minutes of silence, she starts to slow down, her feet scooting along more than actually picking them up and walking. when she finally feels like she's lagging behind: ]

I think my feet hate me right now...

[ doesn't look surprised, as he's been keeping track of her heartbeat & breathing. smiles & tugs them to a temporary stop. lets go of her hand & shuffled on forward with his back to her. crouches out, arms stretched out backward in a welcoming gesture. ]

Nathan-ee-ah, up!

[ blinks at his back and shuffles her feet a little, glancing down at her attire. looks around them, briefly glad it's both relatively dark now and that nobody is around before hopping on up, wrapping her arms around caleb's neck to cling on. tries to peek over to look at his face. ]

I'm ready.

[ loops his arms under her rear to support her as he heaves them up with a single push of his legs. tests his balance a little before closing his one real eye & beginning to walk. ]

House is not far! Can sit soon.

[ shifts her arms a little so she can nuzzle her face into his neck. ]

That's okay, I like it when you carry me.

[ tips his head back a little to bump it against her nose gently. ]

Okay. But say when leg has no feel!

[ laughs lightly and kisses the back of his ear. ]

Yes, sir!

[ twitches when the kiss tickles him, but grins happily anyway. begins to shuffle down the street in a straight line, shifting the weight pressed on his arms once in a while. his head is kept straight as he watches & follows the map in his head, taking care of not being clumsy now that he's carrying nathania.

about ten minutes into a quiet walk toward his apartment, he readjusts her weight one more time, but this time so that he can talk: ]

Give report! House in two minute!

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